Concerning Life as It Is Supposed to Be

Respect for the Dead

My mother’s brother, my Uncle Roger, was a prominent citizen of Valdosta in southern Georgia. Not only did he own Roger Budd Chevrolet, but he served for a time, I understand, in the Georgia State Legislature. His funeral was one of the largest I’ve ever attended.

After the funeral service proper, there was a very long procession from the church to the cemetery. What stunned me about the procession through this old southern town was that traffic coming from the opposite direction of the procession stopped. All traffic in both directions would pull over to let the procession through, showing obvious respect for those who were mourning the loss of a loved one, and for the deceased himself.

I have always assumed that this was a southern tradition. I never experienced it growing up in Ohio. And even though Bradenton is further south than Valdosta, Bradenton is not culturally southern. Some people here turn on their lights and cut into processions in order to sneak through traffic lights.

Not all people, of course.

Most of us simply ignore the funeral processions and secretly hope that we won’t get stopped by one if we are in a hurry. But we still have a number of people, no doubt raised in a slower and more respectful culture, who honor the dead and the mourning by stopping.

As a pastor, my car is normally placed in the procession just ahead of the hearse. From that vantage point, I am able to see just how respectful this whole stopping thing is.

Last Thursday I drove in a procession that snaked its way through the busiest parts of Bradenton during a busy time of day. Most drivers ignored us, but there were those who would, even if the road was two or three lanes in both directions, pull over and wait until the hearse, at least, had passed.

One man not only pulled over, but I saw him remove his hat as the hearse rode by. I was impressed. I hope the family saw him. I’d like to thank him.

Call these empty traditions if you want. Call them unnecessary in our busy, disconnected culture. But from the point of view of the hearse, I call this a kind gesture of respect that acknowledges in a small but meaningful way the wrenching realities of death, and the great honor of life.

It’s a tradition that I hope we can regain.

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2 Comments

  1. MagistraCarminum

    This was the tradition in the Iowa of my childhood as well. Not very Southern, but very old-fashioned… and it is a lovely pause of respect.

  2. Staci Thomas

    My grandmother died in Georgia four years ago. She lived a few hours north of Valdosta. The drive from the funeral to the cemetery was about 30 miles. The funeral was on a beautiful, sunny Sunday afternoon. The drive from the funeral to the cemetery was on a twisty and hilly, two lane road. Every single car that was in the vicinity of the funeral procession stopped. Every. single. one. It was so incredible. I had never experienced anything like it. It was such a gift on a very sad occasion, for my grandmother's death was painful and difficult. The peace that everyone says accompanies the last moments of death occurred as we saw all of those people stop. It was such a gift and I will never forget it. Those people who stopped had no idea what gift they were giving us.

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