One day about a year or so ago, we were sitting around our dinner table on a Sunday afternoon joking about the possibility for an ‘oxymoron’ themed dinner. We have made some progress on this, but we are stuck, and are looking for some suggestions from our brilliant and creative readers. Below is the menu for the dinner as we so far have conceived it. If you can fill in the blanks, or have better ideas for what we have already selected, please let us know via our comments section or through email at somberanddull@gmail.com.
Appetizer:
Jumbo Shrimp
(We would prefer something else here, since this is such a prototypical oxymoron that it has reached cliché status. But so far, this is all we can come up with.)
Salad:
Main Course:
Barbecued Boneless Ribs
Linguine Alfredo
(Our alfredo sauce uses a half ‘n’ half base – fat-free half ‘n’ half, that is.)
Edible Brussel Sprouts
(As clear an oxymoron as there ever was, as far as I’m concerned.)
Dessert:
Drink:
Arizona Brand Southern Style Unsweetened Tea
(I’m not making this up. It really exists. I took this picture myself.)
After Dinner:
Decaffeinated coffee
(I mean, what’s the point?)
As you can see, we NEED YOUR HELP!
If ever we get a complete menu, we’ll invite, if possible, contributors to join us in the feast.
Gus/Adri
How about "crustless quiche" for the appetizer; I have the recipe. For dessert – mini cinnamon rolls from Cinnamental.–ae
Anonymous
If you are considering liquid refreshment with your appetizer: maybe a dry martini?
snowbot
I make oxymoronic drinks/desserts all the time at Starbucks. How about:Venti 8-pump Nonfat Extra Whip White Mocha.Venti with Whip Caramel Frappucino Light.Or, here's one I made today:Nonfat Orange Mango Vivanno (protein smoothie) with Whip Cream and Caramel Drizzle.
Phil
Anything containing tofu is probably oxymoronic in principle.
Randy Greenwald
Thanks for the help!I'm not sure I could handle a martini, but a proper dry wine would seem just as appropriate.And a nonfat extra whip mocha? Yes, I believe that fits the bill.And tofu… now there's one. We use quite often a 'meatless' meat product for our chili and lasagna. Made from tofu. Keep the suggestions coming!