On Wednesday night, our elders met for a very long meeting. It was good, there was much we shared, there was great honesty, and God was honored.
However, at one point, one of the elders made a point, which I passionately hopped on. I made a very strong case addressing, I thought, the weaknesses in his position.
He later pointed out to me that he had not made a case, he had simply raised a question. Which was true. And I had to confess to him that I was arguing against a ghost standing beyond him. He had raised a question, and in the question I heard an implied conclusion that had been drawn and defended by many in my experience over the years. So, his question triggered an automatic response aimed not at him, but at those ghosts beyond him.
I apologized to him.
This arguing ‘beyond’ I find I do too often. I must be reminded to take the time to really hear what another is saying before I respond. So, to all who have the occasion of ever differing with me, know that sometimes the intensity of my response is aimed at those beyond you, and not necessarily at you.